416

i mean 
i guess it’s okay 
but like not really 
because i used to text you every day 
and you’d goof around with me
laugh with me 
cry with me 
send me things when you were thinking about me 
stay up with me 
give me advice 
cry on my shoulder 
give me a shoulder to cry on 

and now that’s gone 
it’s okay 
not really though 
maybe i’m just scared of change 
like i expected we’d stay the same 
you and i 
you’d be in my wedding 
and i’d be in yours 
us every day
taking on the world
together 

can three months of silence heal? 
can separation heal? 

i can’t be bitter if you come back 
i’ve never been able to 
because i forgive too easily 
leave my heart open for everyone 
it’s yours if you want it 
if you so choose 

but you probably won’t 

i guess that’s okay. 

not really though. 

—12.19.18

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